Soooooooo, since I birthed this blog last summer, I obviously haven’t kept up with it as much as I thought I would, and wanted. In the past couple of months I’ve had various ideas for posts run through my mind, failing to write them down, and then of course never got to them.

It got me thinking about other areas in my life that I think about and have every intention of mastering, but the follow through falls short. Let me know if any of these sound familiar:

Exercise

I used to be in such good shape. Metabolism firing on all cylinders, ate whatever I wanted, being active was effortless. As I got older, during annual doctor checkups, I began to hear “you should start increasing the amount of exercise you get, because your metabolism will eventually slow down.” Oh pish tosh! I mean, alright, I knew what was being told to me was true, but I didn’t want to give up being so young and carefree. I always told myself, “I’m never going to allow myself to get too big to fit my clothes.” I took for granted my discipline, thinking I could always get lean and toned whenever I wanted. Such is not the case now. I’m more tired now, and unless I’m dancing or playing a game of volleyball, I hate being consciously aware that I’m exercising. It’s boring, it’s a chore…but I know it’s necessary if I want to be healthier.

Cleaning

I never considered myself to be a neat freak, I don’t mind a little organized chaos every now and then. I never considered myself to be a germophobe either. I knew if I allowed myself to be a germophobic neat freak, every minute at home would be spent cleaning. This is another thing I don’t enjoy. I loathe dusting and vacuuming. Why does dust even exist?! And how does it manage to get into my apartment if I keep the windows closed?! I know. Those are ridiculous questions. But guess what? Dust is ridiculous. When I first moved out on my own, my own rules were not to leave dirty dishes in the sink (especially at the end of the day), to clean the apartment every Saturday, and not let my laundry pile get too high. I’d say for the first year, I stuck to that. And now? I break those rules almost on a daily basis. There I am, standing at the sink, or running the vacuum, or sorting laundry, muttering to myself, “this is the last time I let this happen, I’m going back to my rules.” Not to mention the haphazard piles of clutter I need to purge through. Yeah, fail.

Bedtime

This is probably my biggest issue. Several years ago I started foolishly staying up late because I found it to be the only time I really had to myself, where I could relax and listen to music, not have to interact with my parents and brother at the time because they were all asleep. What’s even more dumb is – even knowing that this was not true – I started thinking, “tomorrow doesn’t come until I go to sleep.” And I would procrastinate on going to bed. I would feel my eyelids getting heavy but would fight sleep because I just wanted to be up. My sleep procrastination goes something like this: I’d somehow get through the workday fighting sleep, then get home and either with or without dinner, fall asleep on the sofa for a few hours, then wake up past 10pm and stay up for another few hours, then go to bed around 1am or 2am only to wake up around 5am or 6am to repeat the vicious cycle. It’s really not healthy, but it’s a hard habit for me to break. I know it’s directly affecting my ability to get exercise going, but I hope to have this improved before the year is over.

Those are main ones I can think of. But those three are pretty crucial to achieving a healthy, responsible adult lifestyle, correct? I feel like such a horrible example to anyone younger than me, or I feel like a fraud to anyone who thinks I have my life together. I don’t want to believe that I’m as lazy as I seem (I’ll throw myself a bone here and say no, I’m not that lazy. I show up for work every day, get my work done, and I pay my rent and bills on time), perhaps I just underestimated how much adulthood would challenge me.

Well. I guess I’ll work on that.